It’s 5:15am and I’m up at the computer on a Tuesday. I’ve been awake since just after 4am and, rather than fight it, decided to get out of bed and make a cup of tea. I’ve been waking up just after 4 o’clock for the last 2 – 3 weeks off and on and my usual M.O. has been to toss and turn, eventually falling asleep and then waking up feeling groggy and annoyed.
So this morning, when my internal alarm clock went off at 4:18am, I decided to just get up rather than fight it. Perhaps this is my body’s way of saying, “You need to wake up earlier and get to bed earlier!” And the truth is, I have been telling Chris that I wish I could wake up earlier in the day. There’s something rather irritating about being woken up by someone else (ahem, my sweet but oh-so-much-of-an-earlybird 3 year old!) as opposed to waking up by yourself. Waking up by myself and realizing, “Hey – I’ve got some time to do stuff! Like have an uninterrupted cup of tea, or blog, or answer an email!” feels luxurious, even if it’s at 4:30 in the morning 🙂 I never, ever though that I’d feel like that!
The job hunt continues. I’ve had 2 interviews for the same position and have a 3rd interview (also for the same position) set up in about a week. I’ve toured 4 daycare facilities, liked 2 of them, disliked 2 of them, filled out wait-list paperwork for my #1 choice and have the registration papers for my #2 choice (which doesn’t have a wait list, Praise the Lord!). I’m feeling more comfortable now that I’ve seen those places, met potential future teachers, and been able to form an idea of what the boys’ days would look like should we enroll them somewhere. Yes, I can honestly say that I’m feeling a sense of peace about putting them in daycare full-time, which is another thing that I never thought I would feel!
Even with these interviews set up and really liking the position that I’m interviewing for, I’m still keeping my options open in the case that this current job doesn’t pan out. I can get worried if I think about it: what if I interview and they don’t like me? What if I get emotionally invested in the thought of working at this place, and then they decide to hire someone else? But then I remember that God is in control of all things, even my job interviews, and if I don’t get this position it’s because it’s not the right one. So, I remember that and feel just fine.
I’ve applied for other positions and I keep my eye on the job postings as they come up, putting in an application when I feel like a position would be a good fit for me and our family. I’ve grown picky. I don’t want to work night-shifts anymore. Could I work them? Yes – absolutely, and I wouldn’t hesitate to take a night-shift job if I needed to. But the fact is that I don’t need to at this point, so I’m allowing myself to be choosy. Hence, only applying for day-shift opportunities. I’m indulging myself, and for all I know this waking up at 4:15am is one more way that God is preparing me to go back to work… hmm… I’ll dwell on that thought later when I’ve had a bit more caffeine…!
I can’t believe that Fall is here. We went to a local pumpkin patch, had Joe pick out a pumpkin, I bought some gorgeous mums (I was glad to find some that looked healthy – all I had seen lately were the grocery-store variety and our grocery store’s variety looked like it had come down with the flu!), and a sweet little decorative pumpkin to go on top of our mailbox stand. I told Joe that I wanted to put the mums by the mailbox, and he replied, “Which moms?! You?” Apparently the mum/mom difference wasn’t pronounced enough. That, or he still recalls me and other moms being referred to as “mum” whilst in New Zealand. Either way, I got a giggle out of the mental image of a bunch of “moms” standing around our mailbox for decoration!
OK, my real alarm clock just went off and I had to rush into the bedroom to turn it off before it woke up Chris. It’s 5:30am and I’d better get a move on. I’ve been heading to the campus gym at 6am (yuck – not about the gym… it’s lovely… more about the thought of working out at 6am!) to get my exercise over with. Yes, I say “get it over with” because working out this early in the morning isn’t my cup of tea! Have a great day 🙂
Hahaha i have to confess i had to google what on earth these mum things are! They look pretty 🙂 All the best for your job interview!
I’ll be praying for you about your job search and school for the boys. I loved mum v. mom, so cute how kids think! I have been waking at 4:30 every morning too. Maybe it’s W’burg;)
Wow, that is early! I was having the same thing a few weeks ago, only to find out it may have been low blood sugar, which then required my body to release a jolt of glucose—thus the sugar rush and open eyes. Danae suggested a snack before bed, and that has kept me sleeping much longer. But you’re right, maybe yours is just boot camp for a future transition (I should probably look at mine the same way actually)!
Also, just remember how much you are bringing to the job, because if you don’t get one it isn’t because you’re not a wonderful nurse, it’s what you said—it’s just not the right fit.
I wish you best of luck for the interview. No matter what stay true to yourself and be confident. I always say when something doesn’t happen that just means it wasn’t for you. Next better thing is just around the corner!